The Most Important of Times

Time spent with my son, was and is the most important times in my life. Those times mean more than anything else that I could ever do or ever want to do. Talking with him, watching him grow from a beautiful small boy to a wonderful and amazing adult. If I could have stayed home for 18 years and not ever worked, I would have been happy. Now that he is grown and married, I think of all the wonderful love and adventure, and moments he has in store for him. His never ending quest to make a difference in the world with technology makes me happy for him, too. I wish him all the love, joy and success he could ever imagine. I wish this because he is my son, and I love him with all of my heart.

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Another Option for Exercising

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Walking is my favorite way to exercise, but it is not possible for the time being. Neither is going to a gym, I tried it on the bus, it just takes too big a chunk out of my day to be going three days a week, even. I did however, bring the gym to me.

The first think I did was to buy a Yoga video, and a yoga mat. I then bought a nice set of hand weights, and a fitness ball. Then I got myself a bench. I have a great workout plan that I just had to take a short break from because I have a temporary small injury, should be healing soon. I wasn’t about to let the lack of transportation, or inability to take long walks keep me from getting fit. I also incorporate my back and vestibular exercises into my weekly workout. I have been doing this for almost a year or more and it is working out quite well. I will post some pictures of my nice little set up soon!

Edited to add photo

Speaking of the Homeless…

It is encouraging to see the number of agencies that are actually helping to eradicate homelessness, yet as I see it some seem more to profess to help the homeless. Our state report on homelessness is not so encouraging. It makes me wonder what these agencies are actually doing? Utah’s report is amazing. Why can’t every state put housing first? It makes more sense. This is not to say that we don’t need agencies to help the homeless get back on their feet, until they figure out something better, but that something better is already here. It’s been proven to work. I can’t help but think when agencies are no longer showing any improvement, do they not become just part of the bureaucracy then? We don’t need more bureaucracy, we need action. We need the homeless people in homes. Housing first.

Walking Early in The Morning

I like walking. It was something I used to do every day. I would leave my house about 4:30 am and start down the quiet neighborhood street that I liked as it had a fairly new sidewalk and was nice and flat, less chance of tripping. It was still dark and was sometimes difficult to see. Once I picked up pace though I was on my way to a great work out. Walking through historical neighborhoods in the early morning hours is so different than walking through them in daylight. In the dark it is so quiet and there is no movement, except for the occasional car passing by, either someone up way too late or someone up early. There is a beautiful river and a lovely view as I continue to walk. Also along the way is a very old cemetery that I carefully walk past, making sure not to scuff my feet by mistake, as to avoid disturbing the resting souls.

The sidewalks are not so smooth and even anymore, so I carefully look down often. I come into the downtown and there are lights that help me see better. Downtown is small but noteworthy and is a must for tourists. I sometimes remember the days when tourism was not the main attraction in our city and what it was like a few decades ago. I walk at a fast pace remembering the way it used to be and all the changes it has gone through. I did object, I did reminisce too much, but finally think it is not so bad and I think change can be good.

Coming up to the main “drag” I know it can be even better. The sidewalks are all broken and making it hard for me to keep an even pace but I do pretty good anyway. I say with all the changes, “why did they forget the sidewalks”? I am irritated and say to myself, “this walk is for you, don’t let the sidewalks get you down”..

Walking past the park and coming up to the Dunkin Donuts that is just opening, I am tempted to go in and grab a cup, being the coffee junkie that I am. I resist and keep on walking past gas stations and walking on wobbly surfaces that remind me of my childhood days. I think they are still the same sidewalks, no? Ok enough about the sidewalks as maybe one day the city will get a clue. Until then, be glad there is good weather to walk in. Be glad you are able to walk without falling. (I have a problem with my ankles, and I used to fall a lot, now hardly ever.)

I come around the bend to the last part of my walk. It is a little uphill and I don’t mind as I know it gives me the workout I need. I reach the street with the trees that hang nearly to the ground, so I dip, and sidestep, and dip some more. I finally reach home. It has been a great walk, lasting about 50 minutes, covering over 2 miles. I head upstairs to my apartment where I rest for a few. I am proud my commitment to walking every day.

I don’t walk anymore, as when the snow came, I had to stop. I tried once and I fell, and it was very hard for me to even get up off of the ground. No I would have to find another way to get my work out.

I miss my walk..

 

Leadership and Communication

I believe that a good communication involves all people in the group, in order for it to work effectively, and democratically. I have heard it said that leadership is responsible for the overall effectiveness of a group, but I think it involves much more. I think that all involved must be willing to be responsible for making the group work well together. I believe it is important in one on one communication as well as group. It is important for formal as well as informal settings.

I think personality has the biggest impact on how one communicates, and also how different personalities can be conducive, or opposed, when communicating. I do know however with some effort, that many problems that get in the way of effective communication, can be overcome, if all communicators are willing to work together to find a solution that works for all involved. Being clear in speaking is very important. I can only say how important it is to try make one’s words clear and with meaning that do not have to be assumed as one way, because a speaker or communicator was not clear enough. I see this in politics a lot as well as other places, such as marriage, or one on one relationships. Ways of communicating can be so diverse and complex, as in nature of the discussion or communication. It could be a group working on a project for school, or work. It could be a community based project, or community based organization, which in itself is highly complex, and has many ways of communicating. If one attends or watches on television, any government group, whether it be local, or on a state or federal level, it is a great way to not only get involved in community, and state and country, by watching and listening, and learning. How people work together, whether it is effective or not, as well. This is clearer when there are roles that are clearly defined and named.

In a more virtual group if roles are not clearly defined, this may present problems that need to be addressed. The nature of the environment has much to do with outcome of communication, such as being in a socially informal group or a more formal one. I think that formal and informal can be misinterpreted sometimes. I think rules are important in helping people to follow a protocol, which helps things go more smoothly. Informal can work also, but with the informal setting people may be more relaxed and therefor maybe less respectful. I am not saying it has to be that way, but it can happen. I think setting up an environment with some ground rules helps with misunderstanding and becomes a place of structure, and structure is important. Like a building one must have a structure that has a firm solid base, as well as construction at all levels being sound. This works for all forms of communication. Just to mention that social everyday interaction, that is not based on a specific protocol, but a more relaxed environment still has many maybe even unseen rules that apply. There is acceptable and unacceptable, as well as many gray areas. One should bring respect into the picture because if one does, they can most likely be sure that communication is working well for all involved.

There are many ways to describe Leadership and ways to communicate and I cannot begin to cover it all. To me, the bottom line is respecting oneself, being able to keep personal boundaries, as well as being able to come out of one’s own comfort zone at times, to create a balance. This can be difficult, but it can be worth the effort. Taking care of one’s own needs is as important as any other.

Written in July 29, ‎2014, but never published publicly.

 

 

Nature, Nurture and Human Development

One could consider nature to be the largest factor in the development of humans, when they are in the womb. However, I have heard of many mothers including myself, who have nurtured their unborn. Mothers can start nurturing their unborn babies early in the pregnancy by keeping themselves nourished, and healthy. This may be considered nature, but it is also nurturing. Other nurturing ways are talking to your unborn, as well as playing music, and reading. I think that the father can be involved also. He can play an important role in nurturing the unborn baby. By loving the mother, and also having a good relationship with her, he can help to keep her calm and secure. The father can also talk to the unborn baby, and just be there for support. I do think also that the communication between parents, or caregivers, can have a positive effect on the unborn child. I can’t say for sure what the baby knows, but I think many parents would want to do everything possible to help their unborn child to become a healthy and happy baby.

When babies are born, so many nature factors are involved. Certainly those attributes contributed by genes, are nature, as well as conditions in the womb, and hereditary factors. Consider hair color, eye color, skin color, etc. All nature, indeed. Gender and size are also nature, but in some ways size may be contributed to nurturing as well. As the child grows, the attributes from nature remain, but nurture from the beginning, hopefully has a powerful, and wonderful impact on the developing child. All the stepping stones along the journey from childhood to adulthood are filled with nature and nurture. Nurture plays an important role in who we will become as human beings. Nurture is not only nourishment for the body, but for the heart, soul, and inner person. To be loved by our parents or caregivers, and to be taught to love, is a beautiful part of nurturing. I think it can be inherent, in nature, as some people in life have little nurturing, but somehow find love and give love, with little to start with. I also think that like a beautiful flower, the seed of love needs to be nurtured for it to grow, and learn to give some love and beauty to others.

As one grows, learning becomes so important as well. Nature can play a role in how we learn, such as whether we have healthy working brains, and healthy working bodies. It most usually does not have to be the deciding factor, as nurturing can overcome so many obstacles in life. Mental states as well as physical, play a role in our development. Hopefully one can get all their needs met to develop as healthy as they can. How we decide to live our lives, in part may be nature, but the story of our lives is uniquely our own. I think that nurture is so very important every step of the way.

 

Reading Nature, Nurture, and Human Diversity in Psychology by David G. Myers has helped me to write this essay. Also personal experiences in my own life has helped as well.

Written in April ‎3, ‎2014, but never published publicly.